Tuesday, December 27, 2016

A Year of Change

What a year of change!

Much of it positive, though not all.

After thirty years in New Brunswick, we moved! We had been talking about it for several years. We had agreed that, when our elderly neighbor was gone, that we would go too.

Her death was a major turning point for us because, not only had we lost a friend and neighbor, but her house would soon become a rental for Rutgers students.

Even with an agreement that we would sell our home, it was still incredibly hard, especially for my wife Joan who suffered emotionally throughout the process. There were days when I thought I might lose her.

Not long after, we also sold our "vacation home," a rental we had purchased for our sons, and their friends, to live in while in college.

In so doing, we cut our ties with New Brunswick, my home town where I had lived for over 61 years.

At this same time, our favorite restaurant, Tumulty's Pub, was sold, and our go-to auto service station, University Shell, was sold too.

And we sold Big Blue, our van of ten years that transported so many people over that time.

2016 was also the year of Eight Weddings including our nephew Sean and our niece Katie whose wedding was an unforgettable adventure in New York City.

There were several funerals too including the sudden and sad passing of my sister-in-law Susan's step-father Jerry, a true mensch, who we all loved so much.

As if to balance the scales, there was the birth of Paige, daughter of our niece Claire.

Looking back over 2016, it seemed to be a marathon of unending change. Our score on the Holmes and Rahe Life Changes scale?  Just over 400.

Lucky for us, we have many healthy coping skills for handling so much change. In particular, we have each other. We have our sons Kevin and David. We have many supportive friends and a close family. We have our faith community at St. Matthias.

Everyone has change in their life to deal with. Some years you get more than others.

Terrence Seamon helps his clients to manage the transitions of change. Follow him on twitter @tseamon, and connect on LinkedIn.

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